Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
