it's not cheating when I paid for it
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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