yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
