i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
