i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize