i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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