...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
she told me i tasted like america
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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