You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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