i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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