That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize