i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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