I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
