shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
