I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
