We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
