just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize