So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
