This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
