Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize