Nicole vs. Life
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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