she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
