Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
