She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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