Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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