He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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