For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
