it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Someone signed my nipple.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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