He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
