I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
