Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I don't deserve a penis
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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