you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
