North Korea, Best Korea!
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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