the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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