Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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