they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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