you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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