Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Randomize