Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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