We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
