Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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