I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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