Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
