the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Randomize
