Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
