My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
