took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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