sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize