no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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