her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
