Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
