I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize